Ready Player One Read-Through: Chapter 31

Content warning: stalking, gun purchasing, references to gun violence and death.



To make a long, long story short, Wade, despite his severe sleep deprivation, manages to hack into a Sixers' weaponry system, order a maintenance tech uniform complete with ID badge, deactivate both his security anklet and eargear by himself, and walk out of the IOI plaza headquarters undetected before his morning shift.


I rode the elevator down in silence, trying not to stare at the camera mounted above the doors. Then I realized the video being shot of me would be scrutinized when this was all over.  Sorrento himself would probably see it, and so would his superiors. So I looked directly into the lens of the camera, smiled, and scratched the bridge of my nose with my middle finger. (Page 297)


A middle finger to the camera. During his escape attempt.

So smart, yet so dangerously stupid!

Wade is a smug, reckless arsehole.

Of course he doesn't get caught.


A steady stream of overcaffeinated office workers scurried across the lobby and in and out of the elevators and exits. These were regular employees, not indents. They were allowed to go home at the end of their shifts. They could even quit if they wanted to. I wondered if it bothered any of them, knowing that thousands of indentured slaves lived and toiled here in the same building, just a few floors away from them. (Page 297)


£"£&%$*^&*&^(*&_*_&^*^%^$%£$"!"!¬"£¬!¬"£""£!£%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You never cared about the indentured slaves yourself, you little shit! NOT WHEN YOU WERE WORKING RIGHT ALONGSIDE THEM! NOT WHEN YOU JUST ABANDONED THEM! TO SAVE YOUR OWN ARSE! 

Don't you dare act all high-and-mighty and morally superior now!

He makes it out no trouble, despite being very conspicuous. Good thing there are no retina scans!

Wade is extremely fucking lucky, isn't he?

Is this the real life, or is it just the OASIS? Is the IOI playing tricks on Wade, and this is actually virtual reality - that he only thinks he is escaping?

Nope! Everybody else really is that stupid. And Ready Player One truly is that simple and straightforward. Critically-acclaimed book!

I can only hold onto my suspension of disbelief for so long.

Once outside, Wade logs onto the OASIS inside a post office box rental.


My heart was pounding as I logged in. I'd been offline for eight whole days--a personal record. (Page 298)


Nothing to be proud of there, Wade!

Only eight days imprisonment - our hero hasn't suffered much then, has he? Not compared to others. Not compared to other indents. Other internment prisoners.

Selfish, privileged wanker.

In the OASIS he sends his friends emails telling them everything, and to meet him in the Basement ASAP. He is sure they will do as he says, and won't be suspicious and untrustworthy.

Everything goes according to plan for Wade. As stated, Ready Player One is that simple.

He also adds in his message to Art3mis: "PS--I think you look even more beautiful in real life." EW! NO! NO! What is he thinking!? How will she not be disgusted by this!?

He finds out that Bryce Lynch is a wanted fugitive by now. He erases that identity and is Wade Watts again. He goes out in public  - a wanted man with cameras and IOI-owned software about - and buys a gun.

From a vending machine.


A few blocks later, I ducked into a Vend-All franchise. Inside there were rows of vending machines that sold everything under the sun. One of them, labeled DEFENSE DISPENSER, offered self-defense equipment: lightweight body armor, chemical repellents, and a wide selection of  handguns. I tapped the screen set into the front of the machine and scrolled through the catalog. After a moment's deliberation, I purchased a flak vest and a Glock 47C pistol, along with three clips of ammo. I also bought a small canister of mace, then paid for everything by pressing my right palm to a hand scanner. My identity was verified and my criminal record was checked. (Page 300)


SHIT!

Guns, pistols, armour, chemicals - a whole fucking arsenal - purchased from a public vending machine!

In the future, guns are handed out as easily as Pez dispensers.

Is this social commentary? Is this a parody? About the current US gun control policies, and its gun violence epidemic and death toll?

If so, then why so blase about it!? Why no introspection? It's just like with the out-of-the-blue suicide plan in chapter 24.

Why bring up such a serious, life-or-death issue if you're not going to do anything with it?!

If anything, the above quote reads like gun porn. Wade has an unnerving amount of knowledge about guns. From living in the stacks? From virtual reality games? Is gun information included in Halliday's Anorak's Almanac? For what purpose?

FYI, "self-defense" is used a lot to excuse most gun violence in America. And police brutality.

What's more: All of the weapons that Wade buys? THEY ARE NEVER USED! EVER! They are a Chekhov's Gun that never goes off!

Many, many trees died to make every single copy of Ready Player One. To make the movie and its advertisements as well.


NAME: WADE WATTS.
OUTSTANDING WARRANTS: NONE.
CREDIT RATING: EXCELLENT.
PURCHASE RESTRICTIONS: NONE.
TRANSACTION APPROVED!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR BUSINESS! (Page 300)


"Activities: None
Sports: None.
Honors: None.

So many memories!"

Getting enough weaponry to start a civil war is just that easy!

Wade describes how holding a real gun feels familiar to him because he'd fired thousands of firearms in virtual reality. No. Fuck no. Guns are not toys, Wade. Real ones are not the same as fake ones. They are not to be used for games. Grow up, before you seriously kill someone.

Wade enters an OASIS parlor chain called the Plug, where he can access the OASIS in his own private room. The Plug, despite being high-profile and relatively expensive to use, is not controlled by the IOI, so our lucky hero remains safe. Convenient!

He still has enough money to do what he wants.

How much money does this kid have?

AAAAAAAANNNNND we're back inside the OASIS! So long, reality! And thanks for all the fish.

Max is back! Locked and uploaded. Did Wade even miss him? I don't know. He'd never mentioned him since first deleting him, and he expresses no emotion upon seeing him again. There wasn't any loss. Seriously.

Wade emails everything he found in IOI's files to major newsfeeds, and sends a single message to every gunter, letting them know what has been going on. Then he logs into the Basement, where Art3mis, Aech and Shoto are already waiting for him.

End of chapter 31.

Wade is in full-Gary Stu mode now. And it is climbing higher still...

The male power fantasy, luck, and plot contrivance have not reached their peak yet. Believe it or not, the book gets more ridiculous.

The nightmare never ends; it just gets worse...