Worst 1 Star Books of 2019

Surprisingly, there are not as many books which I've rated one star this year than I had initially thought. It's nonetheless heartbreaking, however.

Let's clean up this crap already! My Worst 1 Star Books of 2019, totalling ten.





10. Chéri by Colette, Roger Senhouse (Translator)

I think I can safely say that Colette is not for me. A shame because I love the movie Colette!


9. The Family Trade, Vol. 1 by Justin Jordan (Story), Nikki Ryan (Story), Morgan Beem (Art)

An ugly, messy, disjointed comic book. Not even the blatant allusions to and condemnations of the current US president could make this worth it. It isn't subtle in the slightest. How can you take anything seriously in this confusing, un-engaging comic? Please tell me this isn't how noir is supposed to be.


8. American Princess: A Novel of First Daughter Alice Roosevelt by Stephanie Marie Thornton

The blurb is a lie. I'm sure that Alice Roosevelt was a force to be reckoned with. I hadn't even heard of her until I first heard of this book, and it sounded great. Give more attention to female figures and trailblazers in history, please! I wanted to read about Alice's antics, her scandals, her gives-no-shits attitude, her independence, her boldness, her thirst for freedom in a patriarchal society - in a time when women didn't have the vote, and her privileged lifestyle not being as it seemed to the papers, in spite of her father being president of the United States. I wanted her to be loud and proud - to burst out of the pages - to yearn for true freedom. To yearn for truth in her country. American Princess: A Novel of First Daughter Alice Roosevelt delivers none of the above. Instead what I got was a weak, docile, male dependent, spoilt brat and daddy's girl of a president's daughter. She absolutely worships her father, and her views and beliefs reflect his unconditionally, as a Republican. Any thoughts she has for herself don't amount to anything. Was I reading about Alice Roosevelt, or Ivanka Trump's autobiography? For actual, flying fuck's sake, the women's suffrage movement is only mentioned once - and it is as a positive remark made by President Theodore Roosevelt! The fuck was THAT?! It's a pretty boring novel as well, which should be a crime. By 2019 standards, and especially in politics, Alice's "scandalous" life is beyond coy and benign. Alice Roosevelt deserves better by epic proportions, I'm sure.


7. The Dolls' House by Rumer Godden

Review here. Just... what the fuck?


6. Dumplin' by Julie Murphy

Again, review here. This book makes me angry, but the film adaptation improves it so much.


5. The Girl Who Drank the Moon by Kelly Barnhill

See here for my review. Another underdeveloped, WTF fantasy.


4. I, Coriander by Sally Gardner

I was torn over whether I, Coriander is better or worse than The Girl Who Drank the Moon. But at least the latter has diversity attempts going for it, so I judge the former to be the most bafflingly bad children's fantasy novel that I have read this year, which I should have loved but didn't. Review here.


3. Kindred by Octavia E. Butler

*sigh* Read my review here. I don't want to talk about this again. It's too controversial and uncomfortable for me to revisit. Such sensitive, and vitally important, topics... yet this...


2. The Life of Captain Marvel by Margaret Stohl (Writer), Carlos Pacheco (Artist), Marguerite Sauvage (Artist)

Fuck this comic. Review here.


1. Opal Plumstead by Jacqueline Wilson

Hands down the worst book I have read in 2019, bar none. Holy shit this is atrocious. The audacity of it being allowed to be published. Quite possibly the worst children's and YA book I have ever been stupid enough to buy and read through to the end. Towards the last, craptastic page. It is so offensive it hurts. It is legitimately dangerous, for a book aimed at young audiences. It joins Ready Player One, Hush, Hush, Bitten, and Shadowmancer as among the worst books I have ever read in my life. No more Jacqueline Wilson for me. I have grown out of her for good. For more information, read my very long and very ranty review of Opal Plumstead here.





We are not quite done accentuating the negative yet, I'm afraid. Stay tuned.