Sunday 3 September 2017

Non-Fiction Book Review - 'The Vagina Monologues' by Eve Ensler

This review contains excessive amounts of the word "vagina". If for some reason this bothers you, go and take a long hard look at your life and your views on women, then come back to read the review. Or read it anyway regardless.



Read 'The Vagina Monologues'. See 'The Vagina Monologues', and understand, respect, and love vaginas. As their own utterly normal, natural yet amazing thing; not like a goldmine or the Holy Grail in how patriarchal societies and cultures have kept them in the dark - as mysteries - even from people who own them. There is nothing to be ashamed of for having a vagina (and not having one) - there never has been, and it damn well must never be.

Women everywhere, at some point in their lives, perhaps even for the rest of their lives, have been taught on an unconscious level to hate their own bodies. Including the unmentionables. The vagina, and the beautiful package that comes with it.

Women's bodies are universally seen as things that are incomplete: Imperfect. Not good enough. Things that always need fixing: Concealing. Cutting. Bleeding. Penetrating. Sex education in most middle eastern and western countries continues to remain woefully abysmal; full of withholding of information, misinformation, and sexist stigma (it's one of the reasons why the archaic phrase "Boys will be boys" is still used to excuse ignorance and sexual violence; FYI, this is how rape culture thrives). Planned Parenthood is under constant attack right now, because a significant number of conservatives and Republicans see women as so unimportant, so wasteful, and so not needed for the health and continuation of the human race.

How is it that there are quite a lot of women who have never taken the time to actually look at their vaginas? Who have never heard what a clitoris is? Because a clitoris is purely a pleasure nervous system - something that men don't possess in their biology (some transgender and intersex cases can be the exception) - and one of the things the patriarchy hates and fears most is women experiencing pleasure, being comfortable, especially in their sexuality. In themselves. Uppity, out-of-touch (heh heh), conservative men hate whatever women have that they don't, so they build shame and even violence around the very idea of having a vagina. And the very idea of liking sex, and anything sexual.

So, primarily-female organs do not seem awesome anymore, but disgusting, taboo.

So, under the patriarchy, female masturbation and orgasms are almost considered phenomenal, if not mythical.

In 'The Vagina Monologues', an interview piece-turned-theater play started in 1996, Eve Ensler shares real women's stories about their shy, growing, then understanding relationships with their vaginas. Women who are diverse: Black, white, Asian, straight, gay, bisexual, impoverished, young, old, etc. It teaches us to get to know vaginas intimately, individually, free of shame and embarrassment, thus boosting self-esteem; and, in more cases than one would like to acknowledge, allowing for a healing from trauma.

It is shocking, and completely disgraceful, that violence against women has become so normalised that it's practically a rarity to meet a woman who hasn't been subjected to some kind of violence - sexual or otherwise - at any time in her life. A woman who hasn't been harassed, dominated, controlled, violated, or shamed by a man (father, brother, uncle, cousin, partner, friend, a stranger on the bus, etc.) This is rape culture in its toxicity. It is vastly under-reported and not brought to the grassroots/public mainstream's attention enough (i.e. cases of destroyed rape kits: this is our reality). So it is still a common consensus, at the beginning and during the 21st century, that humanity has achieved equality. That is rape culture, too. Ignorance spreads lies, and lies, especially if repeated enough, can be damaging to real lives. Women's lives.

Women are not subhuman creatures because of their vaginas (I also appreciate that Ensler included a story where she met a woman at one of her shows who did not have a vagina; proving that there is in fact no right or wrong way to be a woman or a man). Vagina - a word substituted by countless euphemisms. Vagina, to some extent, remains generally unsaid through embarrassment, stigma, and fear of mockery. Women's unique, lovely bodies are not evil, nor are they punchlines. Nor an excuse to commit heinous acts of violence against them. Hell, 'The Vagina Monologues', in one of its "Vagina Facts" segments, states that when certain men apparently "discovered" clitorises in the 15th-16th centuries, they thought they were a sign that a woman was a witch. Witch hunts - one of the many roots in, and excuses for, widespread misogyny.

Vaginas, like women themselves, are not so mysterious or scary once you get to know them. They're just a part of a body. Someone's own body, not to be used, abused, damaged and destroyed by anyone else.

'The Vagina Monologues' isn't dated. It is more relevant now than ever. It kickstarted V-Day, and other organisations working to this day to end violence against women, until Vagina Day can be celebrated globally alongside Victory Day.

The play is a quick read, and a poignant, honest, deeply personal, tragic, and even humorous eye-opener. Men, including those from college fraternity houses, have been said, in email responses to the countless performances of 'The Vagina Monologues', to change their attitudes towards women by the end of watching a performance. They finally, fully understand women and their lives living under a shaming rape culture and patriarchy. No one should be made to live out their existence hating their own bodies; to not know anything about vaginas except in relation to what it gives to others. That is what is disgusting, not the vagina itself.

Heartbreaking as well as educational, though the play could have been longer, and more diverse. Disabled and transgender women's experiences with their sexuality, sex lives, and their views of vaginas (generally as well as their own) are not mentioned. There are sex stories, period stories, naming stories, vaginal "enlightenment" stories, horrific rape stories, female genital mutilation stories. However, there is only one birth story featured - Eve Ensler's own experience in "being in the same room" when her granddaughter (by her adoptive son) was born; when I had thought it clear in the beginning that she knew she did not represent all women, hence the hundreds of interviews and chosen stories in preparation for the play and performances. 'The Vagina Monologues' is an important feminist text and cultural milestone needing higher attention, but maybe it should receive another updated version sometime.

Maybe it will never be short of updates. What with so many women's stories needing to be heard.

Ignorance isn't bliss. Knowing, seeing, touching, feeling, and understanding is. Especially where the clitoris is concerned. Never will I substitute vagina for any other, childish, stupid, or inaccurate word in a conversation again. People, embrace your awesome bodies! Pleasure yourselves! You've earned it.

Women rule. Men rule. We all rule. Let us take back our bodies, our health, our freedom, our fulfilling experiences as human beings. Our chances at a free, happy life.

Final Score: 4/5

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