Well, my quest to consume all female-led media, particularly in the fantasy genre, was bound to lead me to a manga-inspired webtoon comic called 'Cursed Princess Club', now published in paperback, in volumes. Thankfully, it turns out to be much more substantial, nuanced, multilayered, multiflavoured, heartwarming, loving, and funny than I had anticipated. Indeed, there are some genuinely clever, hilarious moments - character moments - in this sweet, colourful, princess-y tome. It's like if anime took Disney hostage to produce a lovely satire, and 'She-Ra and the Princesses of Power' helped a bit.
Basically, the plot is: Once upon a time, in the Pastel Kingdom, there are three teenage princesses - Maria the blonde, green-eyed one, Lorena the purple-haired, blue-eyed one, and Gwendolyn the, um, unconventional one - plus a pink-haired, highly effeminate, literally shining prince, Jamie, and their loving but overprotective father, King Jack, who wants what is best for his daughters. Despite never having let them out of the palace, or date anyone, he has arranged for them to meet and hopefully marry three princes from the Plaid Kingdom, to unify the kingdoms and strengthen bonds. The princes, Blaine, Lance, and Frederick, are hot, so the girls are into the plans for arranged marriages.But of course things do not turn out so well, at least for Gwendolyn.
The confident Gwen, who has lived her whole life, in a sheltered upbringing, being compared only favourably to her sisters, and has a family who adores her and never comments on her appearance - to everyone at the palace, she truthfully is just as beautiful as her sisters, and anyway, all princesses are beautiful by nature, right?... she hears herself being called ugly, for the first time, by one of the princes, her would-be fiancé Frederick.
The shock sends her running into the haunted forest behind the palace, where she encounters the Cursed Princess Club. The club is for princesses who have had curses put on them which have not been successfully lifted, or they are just not conventionally attractive, not conventionally young and pretty. It's so diverse that it even includes a cursed prince (it's not stated if he's trans, and all indications point to "this is not the case", though it would have made his inclusion even better). Eventually, Gwen becomes a member of this secret ragtag, fun-loving club, full of weirdos sticking together.
Appearance wise, Princess Gwendolyn may fit more into the traditional witch mould, or even a goblin, than the princess archetype. She has green skin, green limp, thinning hair, pointy teeth, pointy ears, sunken eyes, is thin and sickly-looking, and critters like rats and possums get stuck in her hair, often making nests. But she is a princess, and her family, and the club members, don't treat her any differently for her "discrepancies". And she is not cursed.
Or is she?
She is loved, regardless.
It becomes clear that Gwen is the protagonist of 'Cursed Princess Club' the further the reader reads. Her sisters Maria and Lorena don't have much to offer in personality, other than they are pretty, silly, shallow, boy-crazy teenage princesses, played for parody, and they are not really distinguishable. Except Lorena is a little more assertive, prideful, and aggressive, even militant, and can kick butt when she needs to. (Noteworthy point: Why are Maria's attracting animal friends to her, and Lorena's growing flowers around her wherever she sleeps, not brought up again after their introductions?) I'm sure there'll be extra, bounteous moments of them subverting expectations and surprising the reader in future instalments, but for now, the princess that is focused on most potently when delving into 'Cursed Princess Club''s themes and messages is Gwen.
She is undeniable proof that looks are not everything; she is kind, caring and sensitive, and is an amazing chef. It's kind of scary how much I relate to her, or how my shy and insecure teenage self with a still-limited-and-naïve understanding of the world would relate to her.
Gwen is the best princess. She is confident in her abilities, especially in her cooking. She definitely becomes more nervous and insecure once she realises she is "ugly" and different to the rest of her pretty, literally picture-perfect family (Frederick mistook her for an evil haunting spirit when he first saw her in her family portrait, and thought that Jamie was the princess for him!). Damn the patriarchy! Hopefully, with the help of the Cursed Princess Club, who are all about supporting each other and being yourself, and with the reminder that her family loves her for who she is, Gwen will grow and develop out of her funk and anxieties.
Be the wonderful person you always were, Gwendolyn!
There are oh so many other details to mention in 'Cursed Princess Club'. Clever, humorous, and plain old--no, plaid old, and pastel-fuelled, colourful and sweet and cute details. Such as:
Prince Jamie is the world's greatest and most intuitive food critic, and at one point he eats a poisoned apple from a random witch, and must be revived at a "wake", meaning a ceremony where people have to line up to kiss him awake - his one true love, a chocolate-strawberry swirl waffle, does the trick (BTW, his fave food is called a "Magical Friendship Volcano Surprise", the sweetest waffle stack in existence), and he has the potential to be paired with Prince Frederick; the founder of the Cursed Princess Club, Princess Calpernia of the Polygon Kingdom, aka Prez, has a mysterious past, linked to her mysterious, not-yet established curse; Princess Jolie of the Lace Kingdom is cursed to have gaping dark holes where her eyes should be, and things get stuck in them; fifteen-year-old Princess Abbi of the Neon Kingdom is cursed to look like an old lady; Saffron of the Foliage Kingdom is the only prince we see in the club, and his curse is he has an evil green hand; Princess Syrah of the Metallic Kingdom has a Pinocchio curse, and she is awesome and loose and promiscuous; Princess Thermidora is a lobster princess who is cursed to look like a human, in a twisted take on 'The Little Mermaid' (she even likes to sing 'Under the Sea', much to the confusion of the other princesses), only her lobster claws remain (and she looks and acts like Princess Scorpia from 'She-Ra and the Princesses of Power'); a Princess P.A.N.D.A. mascot and keychain; two bickering palace guards who are dressed like nightshift delivery men, one of whom is secretly in love with one of the Pastel princesses; Laverne the prettified Plaid Kingdom llama (effing comedy genius, that!); the Plaid Kingdom's King Leland, who is an abusive father, in contrast to King Jack, yet the two are really close buddies; a 'Thirsty Thirsty Princess' board game; slumber parties; trips to an amusement park, with a haunted house, with vampire clowns; pies; waffles; cookies; wine; soup etc...
And perhaps most surprising, there is an ending chapter all about Frederick's life. It does a magnificent job explaining why he is the way he is, and making me actually like him. Far from being a shallow prick, he's in fact a sensitive soul, who loves books, and has insecurities and issues that stem from being compared to his "manly", princely older brothers. He is verbally and physically abused by his toxic masc simp of a father.
He and Gwen might have a shot after all, if only he can let go of his prior conceptions and assumptions of beauty, and his idea of needing to be saved by a "beautiful, angelic" woman who'll lift him up and show him compassion. He needs to understand that Gwen is not scary, but shy like he is.
But personally, I'm rooting for Frederick to get together with Jamie instead. I totally ship them. Angel cake shipping! (My moniker for them, and it might make sense to those who have read the full volume).
Wait, who is Princess Nell of the Striped Kingdom, the loner Cursed Princess Club member with the red eyes who appears twice? What is her story and curse? TBE (to be explained) in future chapters/volumes, no doubt.
So much fun to be had with 'Cursed Princess Club'. So much to be invested in.
So much to love and adore. It's a joy. A tasty, sparkly cake of a comic.
You bet I recommend it!
Sisterhood! Female friendships! Fathers and daughters! (No mothers, though, as the sisters' mother is dead - typical - before the events of the story.) Different girls and different boys! Hurrah!
Quotes:
GWEN: Maria! Lorena! Wait!! [...] I appreciate all the effort you guys are spending to make sure the princes like us, but... I think we're fine as we are, without any special tactics or... butt architecture...
LORENA: Hmmm, I suppose we do each have our own natural charms... [...] Maria's the graceful one. I'm the strong one. Gwen's the crafty one. And Jamie's the pretty one.
KING LELAND: I may be forcing my children to marry for political alliances... [...] but I wouldn't have my eldest son courting a sixteen-year-old. I'm not a monster.
Final Score: 4/5